To get a foothold, they adulate those of their partners. Who are foot fetishists and how to understand this form of sexual addiction? Explanations and testimonies.
Michel has been married three times. But it is only with his third and current wife that he can openly live his sexuality: Michel is a foot fetishist. “When I look at a woman, the thing that attracts me the most is her feet, which I think is the most sensual, the most attractive part of their body.I would find it hard to find a pretty woman she had big ankles. “
If foot fetishism is not commonplace, its practice has gone through the ages. The first traces of this interest date back to 1000 BC, in Egypt or in Rome, where prostitutes were forbidden to wear shoes in order to fan the desire of men. We find this sexual fascination for the feet in the literature -Octave Mirbeau, the Marquis de Sade-, the cinema -Quentin Tarantino, Pablo Almodovar- or the photography -Elmer Batters.
The shoe designer Christian Louboutin, if he denies being a fetishist himself, based his empire on this eroticization of the female foot: “When I draw, I imagine naked women.The shoe must undress and not dress. Success is a shoe that leaves the woman naked, and a naked woman with shoes is never ridiculous, “he once told Luxury Magazine.
And for a real fetishist like Michel, the shoe designer, it’s the Eldorado: “At home, I’m known as the white wolf, I’m unable to enter one of their shops without leaving with a pair for my We have several hundred of them, which we list in an Excel document, some pairs have more than 13 centimeters of heels, which means that they are importable outside the bed, but that is clearly why they were comic! ”
“He can not stand that I show my feet”
According to the psychotherapist of couple and sexologist Mireille Dubois-Chevalier, the fetishism is defined by the eroticization of a part of the body to the detriment of the subject – namely of the partner. “There is a dimension of submission in this practice.To see the foot of the other, it must be flush with the ground.This is the part of the body farthest from the subject, embodied by the face. in a way, it’s a form of avoidance. ”
This sexual fascination for the feet of women, for the most part among men, interested Freud in his time. According to the father of psychoanalysis, the fetishist has a deep fear of the woman, due to his absence of phallus, which causes him an anxiety of castration. Not being able to face it directly, the fetishist enjoys the woman indirectly with a substitute object.
Analyzes that may seem severe. Colombe, she lives with a foot fetishist and has fun: “With my companion, when we make love, my feet receive special attention, so I try to take care. apply moisturizing masks on my feet to have soft skin, but that does not affect the balance of our sex life, but on a daily basis it can be difficult, it can not stand to show my feet. summer, he hates that I wear sandals.For him, the feet are intimate objects, completely sexual, and show them is the fault of taste.The flip flops, for example, are an aesthetic aberration according to him!
Dysfunctional sexuality or simple sexual play?
While some women are comfortable with this “fad” of their partner, others, on the contrary, keep a mixed memory of their relationship with a fetishist. This is the case of Céline, who, after a break-up that has weakened her, was destabilized by a meeting made on the Internet: “I was a bit clueless, and he offered me money in exchange I did not realize at once that it was a form of prostitution, I accepted because the experience was new, “she says.
“I put on my best shoes and I went to his place, he was a handsome man in his forties, well brought up and in a good position, because of the standing of his apartment. ‘is put to examine my feet, caress them and kiss them.I was extremely embarrassed.I made me drink wine’ to relax ‘, and he asked me to attach it to a radiator and to walk on it, while he was sucking on my feet, it all lasted for an hour, we stayed there, I left and I never answered his calls again. being paid … all that was too weird for me. ”
Martin is a “foot collector”. To obtain his testimony, he had to negotiate: “I will answer only if you send me a photo of your feet.” The tone was given. The photo sent, Martin begins his story: “For me, foot fetishism is a hobby A hobby, tidy in my secret garden I have a file on my computer full of photos of feet. Friends participate, some by sending me photos, others by entering my games Sometimes I just caress myself by looking at their feet, so I feel like I own them, but it can go further I can have fun with strangers, just by looking at their feet in the street, I’m married, I have a family life, but my wife knows nothing of my ‘extras’ with other women’s feet. It’s not deceiving her, since she does not know! ”
For Pascal de Sutter, professor of psychology, clinician and researcher, co-author of The sexual addiction, Ideas received on a misunderstood suffering (Editions Le Cavalier Bleu, 2013), the case of Martin is at the limit of what he calls a “dysfunctional sexuality”. “In the psychic development of these fetishists, the foot is the object of a strong emotional imprint, which goes back to childhood.In ‘collecting feet’, the subject tries to reproduce this sexual excitement felt little child. in pathology when the person can take pleasure only through the feet of his partner.But if it is practiced between two consenting adults, and that the fetishist can also enjoy without going through this, then it is only of a sexual game like any other. “